Leg day. Coach Ana reads out the menu.
COACHToday: walking lunges. To the end of the hall and back. Four times.
DANLunges? Please. It's just walking, but dramatic.
Lap 2 of 4. The hall got longer.
DANWhy is the floor shaking? Is this an earthquake?
COACHThat's your knee, Dan. Keep going.
Inside Dan. Live coverage.
FLEXQUADS ON FIRE! GLUTES ON FIRE! Who invented this?!
BLOBNo idea, but I'm sending them a thank-you card. Best show in town. He won't sit down properly for three days.
Next morning. The stairs.
DANStairs are a scam. Who needs a second floor anyway?
DANI'm going down sideways. It's not pain. It's strategy.
Day 2. Dan tries to sit on the couch. Halfway down, a revelation.
DANWait. If ONE set of lunges does this to me… I've been skipping them for years.
DANThat's it. From today I'm a lunge person. I will MASTER the lunge.
Three weeks later. Lunges twice a week. Small steps, then bigger ones.
COACHSame lunges as week one. Zero limping. Who are you and what did you do with Dan?
FLEXI can walk down stairs FORWARDS now. Character development!
BLOBFine. But I miss the baby giraffe days. Those were the good times.